16 April 2020 Y. General Observations (applicable to all sections above) Y1. While preferable for the Report to reflect only consensus reached during discussions, the Report could highlight significant issues about which delegations did not reach consensus and which require further study. However, listing each and every issue raised by delegations may not be constructive. As demonstrated in the Pre-draft, such lists are lengthy and often incomplete. Proposals with little support are presented in the same light as proposals with significant support. If retained, language should be developed to consistently indicate scale of support. This would minimise the risk of misperception by future readers of the Report. Y2. Encourage consistency of language. As an example, currently “implementation”, “operationalisation”, and “translation” are used interchangeably. The Report should adopt one term, with its meaning defined in the document. Likewise, “actors” is used throughout the report but with different meanings. Consistent with the OEWG’s mandate, the Report should default to “state actors”, with substitution (for example, “non-state actors”) as appropriate. In a similar vein, the Pre-draft refers variously to “malicious use”, “malicious purpose” (etc.). Malicious activity in cyberspace could be interpreted to mean many different things. The Report should adopt language reflective of its mandate, for example: “use of ICTs in a manner inconsistent with international peace and security”. For brevity, “malicious activity” could be defined as such early in the report. Y3. Ensure fidelity of language drawn from existing documents. Text drawn from existing documents should be quoted accurately, with its source acknowledged. Consensus based UN documents, including – but not limited to – GGE Reports and endorsing UNGA resolutions, should not be re-negotiated. References to prior agreement/recognition by the General Assembly should be accompanied by the relevant document references. The Report should clearly demark contextual repetition of agreed consensus text, and new text that that seeks to build upon that consensus. Page 9 of 9 www.dfat.gov.au/cyberaffairs